I’m not sure if you remember any of the last 5 times I told you, but my friend Niki has written an amazing book, which you can purchase on amazon here. In order to increase sales, I’ve decided we need to start our own direct sales company.

I know what you’re thinking, “WOW! WHAT A GREAT IDEA! But what are you getting out of this deal, Laura?” and that’s a good question. The answer is 75% of all profits. Niki hasn’t agreed to it yet, but she’s going to because all of my ideas are great ideas.

I just need a little help getting our pyramid scheme… I mean… mulit level marketing business model set up. Here are some of the ideas I have so far:

Niki will recruit people underneath her that we will call Literary Experts. Those people will all purchase many copies of Niki’s book. They will ask their friends and families to host parties where they pass out quizzes to determine the best book for the party goers. The answers to all questions will lead to Niki’s book. Literary Experts will sell copies of Niki’s book to party goers (at an increased price, obviously) and recruit other Literary Experts to their team and they will receive a small percentage of the sales of each of their team members. The new team members will also ask friends and family to host parties to sell books and so on and so forth.

To keep our Literary Experts motivated, they will always be striving to reach the next level of sales. Each new level achieved will be rewarded with a motivational text with a picture of me attached.

Pink Level-
5 books sold.
Motivational text: “I know you can do better.”

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Blue Level-
20 books sold.
Motivational text: “Great job?”

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Silver level-
50 books sold.
Motivational text: “You’ve made me money. I like money.”

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Gold level-
100 books sold.
Motivational text: “More! More! MORE! SELL MORE!”

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Platinum Level-
1,000 books sold.
Motivational text: “IT’S ABOUT TIME.”

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I’m pretty sure our business is perfect, but it still needs a name. If you have any ideas to help with our business, please leave a comment. The reward for your help will be the amazing business opportunity of joining my team of Literary Experts.

6 thoughts on “Read this for an AMAZING BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY!!!

  1. Business name: Creative Heroines Empowering Authors by Trade. Also known as CHEAT.

    Business model:
    S -spam invitations to friends and family
    C -constantly remind them you’re selling books
    A -aggressively use guilt to persuade loved ones
    M -maintain a professional facade

  2. Don’t forget to call them “boss babes”. I mean, “book babes”. Also, don’t tell them they’re independent contractors. Instead tell them they’re “entrepreneurs” who “own a business”. Works on gullible narcissists every time.

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